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Parenting Our Gifted Children

Welcome to gifted parenting: A checklist of emotions

By Dr. Gail Post,
Licensed Psychologist.

Surprise! Your child is gifted.

Or maybe it wasn't such a surprise. Perhaps you saw the signs from an early age - the precocity, the early language acquisition, the endless questioning, the obsession with everything LEGO. Regardless of whether there was any warning, it is a shock, a joy, and a bundle of anxiety all wrapped in a bow.

As you grapple with decisions about schools and advocacy, as you search for books/classes/activities that engage your child's passions, you might notice that your own emotions surge at unexpected times. They nag at you when your child seems bored at school. They erupt in anger when she is misunderstood or her intentions disparaged. They swell with anxiety as you lie awake worrying about his future. Fear, envy, pride, resentment, disappointment, anger, bitterness - these are no strangers to gifted parents.

So many emotions

The first step toward coping with the emotions that catch most gifted parents by surprise is to identify them.

Read more here...

GailPost

What I have learned...

One thing I have learned over the years as a clinical psychologist, advocate and parent is how often gifted people are misunderstood. It’s astonishing, really. Gifted children are frequently overlooked, languish in classrooms that cannot accommodate their learning needs, and are viewed with suspicion by peers who don’t “get” their differences. Many are ostracized or bullied. And sadly, the most adaptable of the bunch may learn to “fit in” by downplaying their abilities or giving up on school completely.

Gifted adults face similar constraints. Often reeling from the stigma and social challenges of childhood, they may lack confidence in their careers or social interactions. They often feel like outliers and struggle to find like-minded peers, sometimes assuming that there is something wrong with them.

Parents of gifted children manage a balancing act of supporting their child’s needs, advocating within the schools (without creating too many conflicts), and educating others who don’t understand. Those without gifted children might think it’s easy to raise a gifted child. Some assume these children are high achievers, pushed by hovering parents. They also don’t understand how gifted children can be incredibly bright, but have social or other learning deficits. Parents of gifted children end up explaining, educating, and, yes, apologizing when there is no need for apology. It can be overwhelming.

Why I do this...

I started this blog to advocate, explore, and raise questions about the social and emotional aspects of giftedness. As a Clinical Psychologist, in practice for over 30 years, I bring my experience as a clinician to my understanding of giftedness. I have worked collaboratively with gifted education supervisors to evaluate gifted programming, and am aware of the constraints and struggles schools face. My experiences as a parent and as past co-chair of a local gifted advocacy parents group have been humbling and have deepened my understanding of giftedness in my work as a therapist.

How I can work with you...

My psychology practice is in Jenkintown, Pa., just outside of Philadelphia, where I offer:
psychotherapy for adults, adolescents and families
workshops for schools and parent groups
consultation and coaching for gifted adults and parents of gifted children (available in person or via videoconferencing or phone)
clinical supervision for treatment professionals

Please contact me at 215 884-9260, gailpostphd@gailpost.com,
Or
Visit my website, www.gailpost.com, and set up a time to meet for psychotherapy, coaching, supervision, or workshop opportunities.

I welcome your feedback, questions, and ideas, as we work together to advocate for the needs of the gifted.

From the Editor

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Celi Trépanier

Parenting Our Gifted Children

Being a parent provides unparalleled love--it can bring us utter joy and pride. Or it can send us into the throes of complete despair and can break our hearts into a million pieces. Parenting can be both exhilarating and exhausting.

Parenting a gifted child is all the above, only magnified--like 100x!

Parenting your gifted child can be an unpredictable, potholed road with sharp turns, sudden stops, and high-speed accelerations. This issue of the GHF Journey will help you navigate this dizzying path with articles that map out the do's and don'ts of parenting your gifted child. Our featured article by Dr. Gail Post, a licensed psychologist and GHF writer, supports you through your emotional trek. As Dr. Post writes, "The first step toward coping with the emotions that catch most gifted parents by surprise is to identify them."

We also have a brief list of other articles and resources which can support you on your journey to parenting your gifted children.

And if you do not receive The GHF Journey in your inbox, but are seeing it shared on social media, here's how to subscribe: Send an email to me at my email address using SUBSCRIBE in the subject and please provide your email address. I'll get you signed up!

Celi Trépanier
Editorial Director for GHF Learners

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"How are you doing?"

My friend, an educational professional who has worked with gifted children for many years, had intently asked me this question as I wearily plopped down in my chair at the coffee shop where we were meeting. I was desperately in need of a friendly chat—more like an understanding ear. I heard the sincerity in her voice and saw the empathy in her eyes as I abandoned my standard "I'm fine" response for the truthful, "It's hard!"

"I wish others could just understand how difficult it is to raise a gifted child. Mentally, I'm so exhausted. I just wish others knew this," I emotionally lamented.

Of course, she understood completely what I was talking about—her long, successful career had been spent teaching and guiding gifted students and their families. And the truth is, I do wish—really, really wish—others could drop the gifted-children-are-smarter-so-they-have-it-made stereotype they have of our children. Could they simply try to understand that parenting a gifted child can be very challenging?

Read more here...

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Three Column Learning Corporation and Opportunity Unlocked are excited to announce a new partnership!

Check out two exciting new programs at http://beta.opportunityunlocked.com/engineering/ and http://beta.opportunityunlocked.com/challenge/ — and get a preview of more exciting Adventures at http://www.narrativelearning.net/adventures/

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For those of you who can give at least $500 we have created a special recognition program where you will be listed on the GHF website and in our monthly newsletter, The GHF Journey, as valued members of the community. Donations may be kept anonymous.

 
 
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