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This is the 6th Word Savvy Weekly(ish)! Thank you so much for reading! The newsletter has been way fun to work on, and I'm grateful for all of your r
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This is the 6th Word Savvy Weekly(ish)!
Thank you so much for reading! The newsletter has been way fun to work on, and I'm grateful for all of your replies, suggestions, and encouragement.
If you know someone who would like the Weekly(ish), maybe you could forward this to that person! I would love that. In fact, you can just click here to forward to a friend.
Sweet! Now, on to business:
I've got a book stack with new #TBR titles, From Both Sides of the Desk tips for helping kids deal with disappointment, and Super Links, including a sneak peek at family veganism. Spoiler alert: The reactions are mixed. |
Here are three new titles on my #TBR (to-be-read) list:
I blurbed Ghettoside in last week's #TBR post at Literary Quicksand, where I'm a regular contributor. While you're at LQ, you can also check out my review of Between Shades of Gray by Ruta Sepetys, which I really wish I loved.
I scored Eligible as part of my half-off subscription to the Book of the Month Club. It's the re-write of Pride and Prejudice that's getting all kinds of good buzz. I like everything I've read by Sittenfeld (Prep, Sisterland, American Wife), so chances are really good that I'll like this.
I Capture the Castle appeared in my Little Free Library, and I snatched it right out. I've been meaning to read it since my friend Gretchen did a report on it in seventh- or eighth-grade English. Isn't it funny how sometimes you remember random moments like that? This'll probably be a good May book, as well. |
Something I work on all the time with students and my own children is dealing with disappointment. What I find the hardest about kid disappointment is that, as adults, we know that the disappointments are only going to get bigger. Today, for instance, it's not being cast in the middle school play; in six years it'll be not getting into the college of your choice, and then it'll be getting dumped by the seemingly ideal partner and/or being passed over for a job that would've been utterly perfect.
The positive spin here is that we can help kids practice coping with disappointment. Then, they'll know how to bounce back when the heartbreaks are more high-stakes. Here are some things that I try to remember:
1. Don't try to fix it. Do not call the director of the play and demand a part for your child. Don't email the association and accuse the evaluators of favoritism. As Kenneth Ginsburg reminds us, when you do this, your implicit message to your children is that you don't think they're capable of handling disappointment or solving their own problems.
2. At the same time, don't minimize. While it may seem silly and obvious to us ("You don't even really LIKE that kid who didn't invite you to her birthday party!"), the feelings of rejection and sadness are real to the child. Try sharing what you're observing: "I can tell this is really hard for you," or, "I can see that you're really hurt by this." You're showing empathy and inviting conversation.
3. Suggest a path forward. The hardest part of this step is the timing. How long do we acknowledge the feelings and validate them? When do we start encouraging a next step? I don't really know, but ultimately, I think it depends on the depth of the disappointment. When it's time to move on, I like to plant an actionable seed and check in with the kid to see if it sounds like something he could do. "Who could you sit with at lunch today who you know would make you feel really good about yourself?" "What could we do to improve your stick-handling, so evaluators could appreciate your endurance more in tryouts?" "Do you think you might be able to ask the director for some tips for next time?"
Am I missing your favorite strategy? Share it! I'll pass it along! |
On the Blog
I wrote two posts this week about running the TC 1 Mile. The first was, like, why am I doing this; and the second was more, I'm so happy I did this and now I'm doing it every year.
On the Internet
I've been thinking about creative partnerships, and I read about a great one this week. It's between one of my favorite writers Sherman Alexie and the illustrator Yuyi Morales, who together have a new book, Thunder Boy Jr.
In the Writing World
I've been learning about conferences. My writing partner, Susan, told me all about the amazing time she had at Mom 2.0 Summit, which I now want desperately to attend in 2017. And, there are all these cool tweets flying around from Book Con 2016, which are making me majorly jealous. And then, come to find out one of my fave podcasters, Gabriela Pereira of diyMFA is doing a mentorship thing at the Writer's Digest Conference. I'm feeling that I'd have a lot to learn from these events, and I want to go. Is that so much to ask?
On Our Table
Finally, are you wondering how your kids might transition to more healthy eating? Here's the true story of the second week of our sort-of veganism, written by Dan. |
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