Dear Friend,
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. -Ralph Waldo Emerson
To be yourself.
I'm struggling with this idea this week because of how connected we are with social media these days. I had to consciously disconnect myself today because it just became too infuriating. I was filmed last summer for the documentary American Blogger. The trailer was released this past week and the negative backlash has really been only what I can call extraordinary (and not in a positive way). I can understand some of the criticism, mostly surrounding the film's lack of diversity, but it just keeps going: Tweets and articles one after the other. (By the way, the film hasn't even been released yet....opinions are just off of a 2 minute trailer). I wrote about it here.
I rarely speak up about any drama in the blogging world. I try to stay out of it. I try not to engage any of the negativity because it just gets out of hand....but this one hit too close to home. I know Chris Wiegand, the filmmaker, and his family personally. I felt like I needed to speak up. I can't imagine being so misunderstood. Seeing that can make almost anyone second guess putting themselves out into the world creatively.
Recently I picked up a book at the thrift store by Wally of Famous Amos (The Power in You). I read this passage today:
Judgement is like a screen or a wall between you and someone else. It is impossible to love someone if you pass judgements on that individual. You have already determined the type of person he or she is, but you don't really know the person. They stop you from getting to the soul of that individual, and then loving that soul. [...] The critical mind destroys by labeling something as inadequate and then dismantles it; the learning, searching, believing mind creates by seeking to understand, improve upon, grow, and to exist more substantially.
I guess my plea to the world is, make someone feel good today, because GOOD GRIEF we don't need any help feeling bad. Critique graciously. I don't want anyone to ever feel bad because of something I said or did. I don't want to have ridicule and gossip to ever be something that I have connected with someone over. I want to be a magnet for good.
And so I'm back to my original thought: how can we be ourselves...especially in such a culture as this? How can I teach my daughter to be herself without fearing for the big, naive mistakes that happen naturally in life play out online. In her book Daring Greatly, Brene Brown says that she carries a small sheet of paper in her wallet that has written on it the names of people whose opinions of her matter. I think my list has narrowed only to the people who I know have good intentions. Who would be on your list?
Thanks for listening,
Ashley
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