Yes, we know - there is tension in your relationship. And we're here to tell you that's a good thing! .....
Watch the video above or take a minute to read through Chaya's latest article to learn why.
Excerpt:
"We usually think of relationship as a move from separation to union. The gap is seen as the irritating problem...But the Kabbalistic vision is the opposite. There, the gap is the goal. We start out merged and our task is to separate...
We all start out relationship back-to-back, enmeshed. But when we are enmeshed we are unable to achieve real holiness in relationship. When we are woven at the back, we face opposite directions, absolutely blinded, unable to behold who our partner truly is.
The Kabbalistic goal is thus to disentangle and turn to face each other.
We must detach from the enmeshed expectation that our partners need to always like us and to always be like us. Rather we turn to face who our partner actually is – complete with all of their likes and dislikes, similarities and differences.
In this turning we must take the space to embrace our own self-acceptance as well. We must learn that we do not need our partners to love us in order to love ourselves. We do not need them take care of us, because we know very well how to take care of ourselves. Only once we have mastered this work of self-soothing and self-care can we turn to see our partners for who they actually are. Once we love ourselves then we can come to love another. Then we can come into the grace of being face-to-face.
In the face-to-face we each stand sturdy on our own two feet, as self-fulfilled entities. Here, we simply behold each other; free of demands, coercions and disappointments. In the face-to-face we cultivate a sense of curiosity and interest in the unique soul who stands before us. That culture of curiosity naturally breeds love and flowing attraction to the other.
Our goal is thus to endure — and even embrace — the gaps between us.
For it is from that space ‘between’ us that love and even holiness emerges."
READ THE FULL ARTICLE HERE